Thursday, March 29, 2007

The ants go marching two by two....

hoorah!  hoorah!

Not so much when the ants are marching in by two and twenty-two hundred!  And those useless cats just sit there and watch them.  I've admonished them to earn their keep by at least eating a dozen or so, but apparently the ants don't meet the cats' felt needs, so they ignore the mess being dragged in.

The boy crew is all about how to demolish them with maximum force, weapons, thumps and brute stomping force being the preferred WMDs.  The mom factor is not so excited about having ant carcass smeared across the kitchen floor.  I'd much rather have tropical red punch, milk, oatmeal, orange juice, and chocolate mint icing smeared across the floor--more colorful and scentsational that way.

Hmmm, just a thought--but perhaps there is a connection between what has been smeared and the ants marching in?

Naaah!  There must be something else because we've always got those things smeared on the kitchen floor.

Husband's theory is the ongoing mini-drought causing the ants to come inside seeking water.  I'm certainly willing to place some bottle caps full of water OUTSIDE for them to quench their thirst.  No neighborhood should suffer thirsty ants.  Call PETA (People for The Ethical Treatment of Ants).

If I were a really good homeschooling mom, I'd turn this opportunity into a unit study of ants and their antics, I mean habits.  I'd discuss how ants colonize, collect food, and establish community with one another.  The children would studiously draw 3 dimensional pictures of the little ant bodies.  We'd all marvel at their industriousness and quoth unto one another Proverbs 6:6, "Go to the ant, O sluggard; consider her ways, and be wise."  The boys could even sing the song, "Go to the Ant".

Honestly though, I'm just trying to get us through the week to completion with the previously assigned tasks.  Now, if some of the ants would industriously pitch in to help, I'd be happy to grant them scholarship credit.

In the meantime, until a resolution is reached, the gap is breached, and the ants' thirst quenched, join me in a couple of choruses of "The ants go marching two by two, hoorah! hoorah!" 


  1. I love your humor, Elle. If I remember correctly, if you put baking soda at the ant's entrance into the house, it will keep them from coming in. They like their baking soda in a muffin, not plain, and won't step into it.

  2. That's it. You've officially LOST your mind!

  3. I'm glad to hear I don't have the only smeary floor in Blogdom. Though we don't have many ants here, we used to suffer ant invasions by the gazillion in Calif. Get thee some Grant's Ant Stakes. They work.

  4. We have had a constant battle of the ants. . . For ages, now. . .